Title: Fear
I did not want to title this one fear because that sounds so bad. And fear is not a bad thing. In fact, it’s a propellor. Still, sometimes, it’s a negative thing. Fear makes you try things, it makes you overcome things, or it makes you not try anything at all.
Case in point. I have a ticket. Its for an event in Vegas. There is a place called The Strat Hotel, Casino and Skypod. The Skypod is iconic. It’s 1,149 feet high and it features a SkyJump where you freefall from 829 feet above the Las Vegas Strip. I’m going to jump. I know what I want to do and my plan is to do it!
It is great to be scared, fearful even and then say to yourself, screw that, I’m not going to be scared anymore, I’m going to do this thing. Some of our earliest experiences may be the ghost under our bed or in our closet when we were children. And some of our fears concerned actual people in our rooms that we couldn’t reason away. It was an actual person whose psychological – mental and emotional – efforts were actual and frightening. Or physical – with someone beating you with sticks, fists, locks or extension cords. Or sexual – and not holding hands like you see lovers do or reminiscent of a well-written love story movie. No, it was something that humiliates you when daylight comes and you traverse your day. Something you would not discuss or tell a friend. Definitely not tell a friend because in our situation you are not allowed any that you could confide in.
You know that if you even attempt to contact an authority you are met first, in your mind, with an overcast shadow of your abuser and you know you know you had better not say anything. And in the instance where the abuser exhibits all 3 of those abusive characteristics, well I hate to think back on the fear I felt.
When I write, I don’t make references to the Bible. And I do believe in God. Today I will. I’m reminded here of, “Though I walk through valleys as dark as death, I won’t be afraid. I’ll stop there and change it to, Although I walk in the shadow of a coward who abuses me, I’ll stop being afraid so that I may begin to enjoy Your gift called life.
The second one I’m reminded of is when they were in that terrible storm. They said, “Save us!” Jesus said, “Why are you afraid?” AND “You surely don’t have much faith.”
Faith is the nature of hope. Faith is the evidence of things you cannot see.
You can’t see your thoughts. You can’t see your hope. You can’t see your wishes. You can’t see your yearning to be free. Not physically. Faith is some kind of magnifying glass!
Have faith in your hope that the things you want but cannot see will come to pass, even if you have to face a coward. Or if you have to go a-runnin’ like Mary and Joseph.
829 feet! I’ll keep you posted.